Calming Down And Moving Forward

I’m the first to admit that my youngest son is “all boy”; this is code for just a little crazy.  He is literally running from the moment he wakes up until the moment he finally crashes into sleep.

This has been a tough adjustment for me seeing as though neither my older son nor my daughter was ever like this when they were two (it seemed like it was tough at the time, but looking back, dealing with the two of them together – they are only 17 months apart – was easier than dealing with my little guy).

I am always tired and usually exasperated by having to say “no” over and over again, or dealing with yet another epic meltdown, and boy can he have them.  The real problem is that he looks much older than 2 because he is very tall and built like a linebacker (neither the pediatrician nor I can make sense of this because my other two are smaller and very thin).  This makes it much harder on my back and makes people in public much less inclined to give him a break when he does have “a moment”.  I don’t really care about our adoring public at this point, but my back cares a lot.  Many days have ended with me in tears over ridiculous struggles.  C’est la vie.

But, I have recently decided that instead of constantly complaining and pleading with God for a calmer kid, I would remind myself to be thankful that he is healthy enough to have the energy to be a little crazy and try to embrace this by doing new things with him where he can let it all out, while also working with him on reeling it in as much as he can when the time calls for it.  I think if it were up to my husband, we would just sit at home or only go to outdoor venues until the phase passes (we are fervently praying that it does), but I am now seeing this as a challenge and a teaching experience.  After a lot of whining and bitterness toward those families with calm kids (yes, I was/am totally jealous of the parents with shy kids who sit still for longer than .3 seconds – I’m human and I’m tired), I feel like I am ready to face it head on!  My back? Not so sure, but willing to give it a try.

I have started to do new outings with him while my big kids are at school; some work, some don’t and that’s ok.  It’s NEVER easy because he is still in constant motion and has a mind of his own, but I can tell he is loving life and that’s what’s really important, right?  I know it is normal to test the boundaries when you are two and as far as that goes, he is extremely normal, perhaps above average even (not sure that is something to brag about, but there you have it).  I want him to keep his spirit and show his sweetness off to others and I know the day is coming where he won’t always be the loud, crazy kid with the frazzled mom chasing slowly after him on her motorized scooter – that’s where I feel I may be headed, but hopefully that won’t actually come to fruition.

My baby is special and I am determined to keep him that way, even if  he seems more determined to break me.  Until the day comes when we reach a mutual understanding regarding acceptable behavior, I will enjoy the beautiful (and rare) moments like this!!!

the only time my favorite little guy is still.

snuggling – the only time my favorite little guy is still.

Please pray for me as I embark on this new outlook on life (and share secret tips if you have them)……and pray for lots of naps, too! 🙂



19 thoughts on “Calming Down And Moving Forward

  1. It sounds like you’re doing a wonderful job! I have a 2 year old boy, but no other child to compare him to. I also get jealous of parents of seemingly sedate children in public places. I hope your back is up to it – I can relate!

  2. I really love your fishy metaphor in your story about reeling him in, and letting him go. I will pray for you, but with God on your side nothing is impossible!!!! Also, redirecting all that energy for good will be a beautiful thing as he grows up.
    Blessings in Christ

  3. I’m glad I read this today! My youngest is such a handful and none of my three older kids were that way. I have to keep reminding myself that he is unique and I can’t expect him to be like the other kids. It just takes a lot of energy. You are not alone!

  4. Aw, prayers and hugs for you, mama! I am starting to experience the ‘breakdowns’ in public lately, and my son seemingly relishes the attention it brings from strangers. It can be so frustrating! I think you have a great attitude about the situation though!

  5. I remember when Iris was 2 years old and I was pregnant with Bency, my best friend had a 2 year old boy. We would go to story hour together and Iris would be sitting still while her son ran like a crazy maniac all over the place. She would say, “wait until you have your boy, you’ll find out what parenting is all about”! With Bency, there definitely was a difference and I finally had a “crazy maniac”. Cesar falls somewhere in the middle. He is really easy going but can have his “boy” moments. Bency has continued to be the more difficult child for me but honestly there is something really special about him that I wouldn’t trade in place of having him calm. I remember when he was 3 years old I would just fall into bed each night in exhaustion. I don’t think it has necessarily got better but I have grown to learn what to expect and just accept it. So yes, I know what you are going through and it is hard but so worth it….especially when they fall asleep!!! haha!!

    • He is definitely the epitome of “all boy”. Mikey was never as wild, he has always been more serious and philosophical (as much as one can be when they are little) so I had no idea this is what could happen with the stereotypical boy! NEVER a dull moment with this one! haha! You’re right about not wanting to trade the crazy away though. It is what makes them special and unique….I just need a few seconds to rest every few hours! 🙂

  6. I can certainly feel your pain/fatigue! When Emily came along as our #3 child, I was in for a rude awakening. The first 2 were calm, well behaved, and when prepared ‘church ready’ stayed that way until I told them they could get dirty (lol). I had never had to baby proof the house and if I told them ‘no’ it rarely took more than one utterance. Now, when our Emily came along, it was an entirely different story! The entire house had to be rearranged with locks on all cabinets almost before she could even crawl. I honestly felt that if she had been the first one, she would have definitely been an only child! I would get her ready to go somewhere complete with hair combed and bow in hair and before I could pick up my keys the bow was lopsided and something would have dirtied up her outfit. What?!
    Well, we have made it…she is now 20, in college, doing very well and is managing pretty much on her own beautifully. Now those memories of her early years are little more than memories but are always thought of with a smile 🙂
    Courtney, this too shall pass. Treasure him while he is still so active as to keep both himself and you in shape! Give Big Trouble an extra hug today from me and let him out the door to run!

    • Ms. Joann, I feel the same way about Troy. He most likely would have been an only child had he been the first. I guess that’s why God teases us with the first few and throws a crazy one in there so it’s too late to turn back! haha! He has been getting plenty of running time in and even a little walking around stores lately (with only the occasional meltdown) so I think that is helping. I’m just trying to keep up! 🙂

  7. Wow it’s like you have described my own son, only my boy is 3! I’m hoping for more patience on my part too because I think he is what is he and won’t change.

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