Lately, my baby has employed the art of clapping as yet another method to keep himself awake. I have never seen this before and if it were someone else’s baby, I would think it was so adorable. However, since he’s mine and he needs to be sleeping, it’s not quite as enjoyable and merely makes me try to come up with new ways to keep myself awake until he stops clapping! As such, I have concocted an ode to Elizabeth Barrett Browning’s ‘How Do I Love Thee?’ as an omage to dealing with my son’s quest for the antithesis of narcolepsy. Enjoy.
How do I stay awake? Let me count the ways.
I drink a Starbucks Mocha, a blend of black and white;
I watch many a rerun to keep me sane through the night.
My blessed children, of which now I have three,
Torture me daily with an overload of Sprout TV.
An occasional pinch or smack to my face,
Helps keep me focused on each current case.
If ever I feel like I must have a nap,
My little one is sure to wake me up with a clap.
I often keep alert with loud music, dancing and singing;
There’s my last shred of sanity, to which I am fervently clinging.
Fighting amongst the kids is always added into the mix;
This is the point where I grab another caffeine fix.
Even with these methods, I may never really know,
How I am able to maintain this motherhood show.
So, until I get that slumber that I so desperately seek,
I must simply rely on these tricks to keep me at my peak.